Dear Nesta.
I hope all is well with you in Sargeant.
I am learning a lot at this retreat of Jewish studies for women. There are women of all ages, who are all passionate about learning. Our classes start at 9 a.m. and end at 11 pm every night. I am barely getting enough hours of sleep. And it is all worth it.
However, yesterday I got frustrated.
We learned about the role of women according to Jewish Law, which is followed to the letter by Orthodox and Chasidic Jews. The emphasis was of course on the woman’s obligation to get married, have children and care for the Jewish home.
“Not getting married at 18 means you’re putting off life,” the Chasidic rabbi said in class.
I felt like I was going to run out of the classroom. I don’t know if the frustration I was feeling was because I was being told that I was not leading a real life or was it because I was wondering _ deep down inside _ if my decision to wait to get married and have children had been a mistake?
Either way, I had to flee the building. On my way to grab my jogging outfit, I met the rabbi. I asked him if wearing pants was appropriate for a woman going jogging. He kindly replied that women usually wear a skirt over their pants.
What?! I thought to myself. Does he know how hot it is out there?
Under normal circumstances, I would have understood. The Chabad dressed code for women is to be covered from the collar bone to the elbows and knees. And not to cross dress. But I was already agitated by the class discussion on marriage and was not so open to listen. I went for a power walk in the woods to calm down.
Today, I am still thinking about the choices I’ve made in my life and the decisions I will face as I learn more about my own faith and heritage.
Shabbat Shalom!
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